2019 is Complete
Well, I managed to complete the National Poetry Writing Month challenge 2019 and wrote a poem every day for the 30 days of April.
On the whole it was good fun, I learnt a few new poetry forms and had fun writing about some of the strange national days that exist – like National Grilled Cheese Sandwich Day – yes, really.
The political stuff was shared on Twitter and all the poems are now on Instagram if you want to follow along with future poetry.
Here’s a summary of the second half. Those underlined are of a political nature, the rest are not. They are all now up in the gallery too, if you want to read them with the associated artwork;
- Brexit Party
- Poem In Your Pocket
- Garlic Day
- Lima Beans Appreciation
- Easter
- Earth Day
- Sonnet about a picnic and a lost dog
- Stop Snoring
- Take you kid to work day
- On your feet day
- Hayfever
- Ed Balls Day
- The Pen is mightier than the sword
- The End
Brexit Party
April 17th is Haiku day, since Haiku have 17 syllables;
New vote, a new hope
Fresh impetus for Leaving
Vote Brexit Party
Poem In Your Pocket Day
Perhaps a somewhat literal interpretation of Poem In Your Pocket day!
Business card, Mobile phone,
Chewing gum, ticket home,
Tissue, Wallet, 50p,
Old sweet wrapper, new hankie
Garlic Day
Another of those funny days – 19th April is Garlic day
I love to eat raw garlic
I have it every day
It helps my blood stay healthy
And it keeps people away
Lima Beans Appreciation
And another of those odd days – well why not.
Phaseolus lunatus,
Lima Bean to you and me
Is a source of dietary fibre,
And is virtually fat-free
Full of useful minerals
And loads of Vitamin B
Make sure that you have loads of
Yummy Lima Beans for tea
Easter
Fairly obvious topic for Easter Sunday, written as an acrostic;
Egg hunts
And bonnets
Spring chicks hatched
Toasted hot cross buns
Eaten
Rabbits hop
Earth Day
You’ll know my thoughts on global warming/ climate change already, but here it is in verse;
CO2 has been much higher
Than it is today
Wasn’t due to 4x4s then,
And how’d it go away?
Greenland really was once green
That’s how it got its name
Now we’re told that icecaps melting’s
A crisis, we’re to blame
Our planet’s climate’s ever-changing
Can’t stop it I’m afraid
It takes a special kind of arrogance
To believe it’s all man made
This doesn’t mean we should be wasteful
Or not care about our home
Or protect the species we share earth with
‘Cause when they’re gone they’re gone
Sonnet About A Picnic And A Lost Dog
23rd April is ‘Speak like Shakespeare Day’ (he was born and died on 23rd April), it’s ‘Picnic Day’ and ‘Stray Dog Awareness Day’, so here’s a threefa. Almost written in iambic pentameter too;
Forsooth, tis true, this is a splendid day
For picnicking upon the village green
We’ll meet at noon, I trust thou shan’t delay
Or else the pies be gone and no more seen
Bring’st thou the eggs of scotch and sticks of bread
A dozen rolls of sausage shall I bring
And sauce confections of both brown and red
To make thine taste buds really dance and sing
But looketh out most careful for a hound
Mine neighbour’s mutt hath gone and now is lost
He promised to the finder fifty pounds
And all the ale that in one night be quaffed
I know’st that I shall find it, take as read
That mutt be current tied up in my shed
Stop Snoring Day
An inebriated warthog
Lying in the bed
Snorting like a good’un
Teeth rattle in my head
For God’s sake please turn over
I need to get some rest
Another night without sleep
I’m getting so depressed
Some days I’d like to smother you
(With a pillow, not with kisses)
But when your quiet reminds me
I still love you, you’re my Missus
Take you kid to work day
It’s take you kid to work day
My son is only three
I’m a British politician
He’ll do a better job than me
Stand up for your health day
Stand up for your health, there’s lots you can do,
To improve circulation and lose some weight too,
Stand during phone calls, it helps pass the time,
Use the stairs for a change, exercise ain’t a crime.
Take a break from your seat every half hour or so,
Eat away from your desk, good food on the go,
Have standing up meetings they’re always much shorter,
Encourage your colleagues, “On Your Feet Day” supporter.
Been planning what I’m going to do to take part,
Sit Less, Move More, ride to work for a start,
And walk to see others, not rely the phone,
But I’ve sat here all day, writing this bloody poem!
Hayfever
Allergy awareness week, and as a hayfever sufferer this seems appropriate;
I wanted to write achoo poem
About suffering with hayachoofever
Itching eyesachoo, runny nose
A non-stop snot achoo sneezer
I’ve gone through twenty tissachoos
Just writing these fewachoo lines
I’d like to sayachoo much more
But with this sneezing there’s noachoo time
Ed Balls Day
A peculiarly British thing, named after a somewhat inept politician called Ed Balls.
28th of May
National #edballs day
A man famous for a tweet
And a General Election defeat
Shown not to be much of a dancer
More a Blairite political chancer
Made tens of thousands with his wife
Screwing taxpayers for an easy life
Flipping homes with ease
Like flipping burgers in McD’s
Treats politics as a cash cow
We once laughed at him, who’s laughing now?
The Pen Is Mightier Than The Sword
It’s National Stationery Week;
It’s National Stationery Week,
Make sure you write that down.
Put a post-it in your diary
Or in your notebook (wirebound)
Don’t write the words in pencil
Someone else might rub them out
Use you finest fountain pen
There can then be no doubt
NaPoWriMo 2019 – The End
Thirty days have come and gone
Thirty days of verse
Not sure my rhymes are getting better
Of if they’re getting worse
I wrote about a lot of stuff
From Racist Ducks and Shit
To Sunday lunches, Snoring Wives
And several on Brexit
But now we’re at day thirty
And this is where it ends
‘Til April 2020
When we do it all again
Phil C.